"The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry" (Robert Burns: To a Mouse)
No matter how carefully we make plans or how much effort we collectively put into implementing them, there are times when things do not work out as we had intended to or wanted them to. We find ourselves having to be fleet of foot, adapting as we go, or having to start again. And sometimes what goes wrong is terminal.
We can perhaps recognise when the problems arise out of our own actions. But of course, there are times, when our plans are impacted by what someone else does or doesn't do.
However it happens, it is only natural to feel disappointed when things do not turn out as expected. And no matter what age we are, handling disappointment can be challenging. There can be sadness and anger, a sense of frustration or despair. If we had a lot resting on a particular outcome, our disappointment might be considerable.
With all that is happening within the Church of Scotland at the moment, disappointment is evident and understandable. The plans some congregations have had for the development of buildings and mission have not come to fruition. Others have had to wait such a long time for plans to unfold, that the energy needed to implement them has dwindled. As the proverb puts it - 'hope deferred makes the heart sick'.
How we handle our disappointment is incredibly important. A good starting point is being honest about it - expressing what it is that has gone wrong and the impact of that upon us. We have in the psalms good material on which to model our approach. The authors hold nothing back when it comes to making God aware of their sense of disappointment, in Him and in others. Acknowledging the grief that we are experiencing can be part of that honesty approach.
But when we've done that - when we've laid out our complaint (for want of a better word), and sought an understanding of why things are the way they are, what do we do next? Do we stay in that place of lament? Or is it possible to begin moving towards a different future? Is it possible to embrace what has happened and look for how God is present within it? Is it possible to lay aside our previous plans and develop new ones, which have a sense of life and hope?
It is much easier said than done. Disappointment can run deep - especially if we feel others have let us down. But the story of our faith is about God transforming the most difficult of places into places of hope. May He help and guide us as we journey through our valleys of disappointment and as we support others doing the same.
Rev Stella
